Once upon a time
by Zauriel Angelus
Summary: Xander is stuck in the wildest adventure of his lifetime. Babes , guns , swords , bad guys and babes. Nothing too serious here man. Take a seat and enjoy the ride :) FX . Wicked cool...mmmfaith. UPDATED part 4 is up. Sorry bout the wait
1. Default Chapter

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Disclaimer : I own nothing and to quote a friend of mine , I refuse to believe that this is even necessary !!! but for traditions sake , all characters belong to their respective owners and the only right I have is the credit to this here as I tell you this story. Oh , and yeah the story's mine as well : )

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Rating : Its mostly PG but I'm putting an R on it just in case. 

****

Summary : Xander has an epic adventure. I'm trying to be all cool and vague here. Is it working ??? Whaddya mean no ? 

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Author's notes : This aint nothing serious but it aint gonna be lame either. I had a little idea that just popped into my head. The lil' idea kept bouncing up and down telling me this is gonna be fun and hell yeah I agree with that wholeheartedly : ) 

****

Feedback : yes please …?

****

Dedication : I never thought I'd be doing this but I'm gonna dedicate this to Buffyverse's biggest spud – Riley Finn . Without him I would've still been puking at the disgusting shagfest that is Spuffy. No offense B/S-ers , I love Spike but sometimes too much is just too much. *shudder* Cheers to ya Agent potato nose !!! Ya aint so bad after all. Finally I'm able to write Buffy fanfic again. Thank you Riley. Last but not least to all Xander fans out there. This story is mainly for you. Enjoy.

~**~

Once upon a time … by Zauriel Angelus

~**~

Prologue :- 

--------------

" Hi…" 

A familiar voice greets me as I try to open my eyes. Sunlight quickly streams into my vision and for a moment I was blinded. A headache feels awfully near as does confusion as I strain myself to think. I was lying on something really soft and comfortable , probably a bed but I don't remember my own bed being this comfy so where the heck was I ? 

" Good morning." 

Finally I could make out the shape right in front of me. It was human so that was definitely a relief. I was afraid a demon kidnapped me or something. Knowing the luck of just being Xander Harris , that was entirely possible. And then I realize it was female …with dark wavy raven hair trailing down her shoulders, beautiful smooth and slightly tanned skin , big green brown eyes … gorgeously beautiful. 

Wait a sec …

" Faith ?!" 

" Xander ," she nodded with a smile. 

" Um…good morning to you too." I managed to mumble out. 

At that point I found myself strangely enchanted by her eyes. There was something captivating in the way she was looking at me. She seemed totally different from the Faith I knew to be. This wasn't psycho slayer bitch or …was it ? Maybe this wasn't real and hey !!! she doesn't seem to be wearing …anything at all. 

She can't be psycho slayer. 

This was just another one of my famous wet dreams. 

No way is she real. 

'Not real' Faith slid over as I held my breath for what seemed eternity. She captures my lips with her own. The pleasure of having her soft lips on mine is simply intoxicating and I respond positively to her sweet oral caresses by kissing back. Our kiss goes deep and passionate , lasting for who knows how long. She tastes like chocolate , sweet and delicious…an utterly sinful delight. Hee. When it finally breaks , we're both left entirely breathless. 

" That real enough for you ?" Faith smirks at me as I continue to gasp for air. 

"Oh … I must've been thinking out loud." I shake my head a little bit and smirk back. "If this _is_ a dream I want this to never ever end." 

She laughs. Hmmn … I don't think I've ever heard Faith laugh before. It's a very pleasant sound. 

" We're naked." I blinked with surprise.

" _Good _observation , boy toy." That was sarcasm of course. 

Taking advantage of our current situation I slip my arm around her neck and pulling her in for another kiss. She obliges happily , lightly sucking on my lower lip as I slip my tongue into her mouth , running my fingers through her long dark hair. She felt so damn good in my arms and tasted even better. 

Click. 

Weird… that felt like a gun shoved up my neck. 

I slowly open my eyes and look down. 

Yup, there's a gun shoved up my neck and Faith's the one holding it. 

I look and up at Faith this time. 

" What …!?" was her stone cold emotionless response. 

Click. 

Beat. 

" Just kidding." 

She laughs it off , throwing the gun over her shoulder. The resounding thud I hear as it hits the floor echoes in my head as does the laughter ringing in my ears , my heart thumping against my throat. The dark haired destroyer of a goddess smiles before me , crushing her heavenly pink lips upon my hapless soul as I drowned in this shakily surreal vision. 

__

Oh my god. 

What in the hellmouth did I get myself into this time … ? 

---------------------------

end prologue.

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End notes : I'm having a lot of fun with this one. I have a few surprises coming up. And yes this is a crossover fic. As for what crossover exactly , I'm not telling. (insert evil laugh here) If ya like it so far , gimme feedback people. Tell me what ya think and btw thanks a lot for reading. 

Feedback please ? 

Till next time I remain ……..


	2. part One

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Disclaimer : I own nothing and to quote a friend of mine , I refuse to believe that this is even necessary !!! but for traditions sake , all characters belong to their respective owners and the only right I have is the credit to this here as I tell you this story. Oh , and yeah the story's mine as well : )

****

Rating : Its mostly PG but I'm putting an R on it just in case. 

****

Summary : Xander has an epic adventure. I'm trying to be all cool and vague here. Is it working ??? Whaddya mean no ? 

****

Author's notes : Sorry for being late but Rela Life caught up with me. My cousin is getting married and someone I knew died this past week. Anyway its good to return to the world of fanfic where everything is so much more simpler and happier. Again - This aint nothing serious but it aint gonna be lame either. I had a little idea that just popped into my head. The lil' idea kept bouncing up and down telling me this is gonna be fun and hell yeah I agree with that wholeheartedly : ) 

****

Feedback : yes please …?

****

Dedication : I never thought I'd be doing this but I'm gonna dedicate this to Buffyverse's biggest spud – Riley Finn . Without him I would've still been puking at the disgusting shagfest that is Spuffy. No offense B/S-ers , I love Spike but sometimes too much is just too much. *shudder* Cheers to ya Agent potato nose !!! Ya aint so bad after all. Finally I'm able to write Buffy fanfic again. Thank you Riley. Added thanks goes to all who reviewed. Thank you all again for your comments. 

In no particular order my appreciation goes to Lori Bush ( Hey Lori !!!) , Lesley Ann Colgan ( Love ya Lesley ), Mad Minute , Aenima , Bolo , Furious George , Malaskor , Ghostrider , Amelia , Obsidian , Andy , Varthan , Jane McCartney , Elf , WBH21C (Bill) , T D Master ,( again , nah… there's nothing wrong with my account man .y'see ?) Kellan L (Hiya !!! *waves back at ya) and Echoes of the mind. Thank you all so much. 

Last but not least to all Xander fans out there. This story is mainly for you. Please Enjoy…

~**~

Once upon a time … by Zauriel Angelus

~**~

Part one:-

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It felt as if I woke up in a new dream …

" Faith…"

…the taste of a certain raven-haired slayer's lips still lingering upon mine. 

She lays quietly beside me , her eyes closed to the world. She sleeps soundly , a faint smile adoring her face as I slowly smooth out the curves of her hair. The bed is a tousle of sheets and I wander to the side , swinging my legs to the floor. It's the first time I ever really looked at the room that surrounded my view. It wasn't anything much to look at though. 

The small room was plain , if a bit dirty. The white paint on the walls had yellowed years ago I bet. There was a rusty metal fan atop the dresser beside the bed. The switch was on but the fan wasn't turning , probably busted. My nose could vaguely detect the slight smell of vomit somewhere nearby but the worst of my predicament stared me right in the face.

" No tv in sight… " 

Wasn't even a radio lying around . That meant no country music to share my pain with.

" No cartoons for today. How will I _ever_ survive ?" I chuckle , mostly to myself. 

From the open window , a cool breeze blew through the light brown curtains. It was still day out there and from what I could see , I guessed it was around midday afternoon. 

I smiled… 

It was weird really.

For a moment there I felt like I was right at home. 

A pair of black pants hung within my reach and I quickly put 'em on as well as smelly socks and my trusty leather boots, taking care to make as little noise as I could so as not to wake up the slayer sleeping in bed. My eyes spot a cockroach skitter across the floor inches away from my foot as I finished It was a pretty huge one. I was a little surprised that I didn't scream like a girl at its sudden appearance but anyway I caught sight of something else poking from underneath the bed. 

Naturally curiosity got the better of me and I poked back. My hand explored the nether regions down under and pulled it out. 

" An old guitar…?" 

I held it in front of me , looking it over a bit. It was dusty but otherwise in pretty good shape. 

" Hmnnn…." 

I sat myself down on the side of the bed , settling the old pal in my lap. My fingers strummed through the strings gently , wiping off some of the dust. Then I began feeling the texture of its sound from my skin , my palm listening closely upon its surface. 

I spared a glance on Faith.

Amazingly enough she looked kinda …normal. 

No … scratch that. She looked more like an_ angel_… Honestly she really, really did. And as I heard her breath softly in slumber , my eyes closed with her image burned into my thoughts. My mind cleared and I felt as if I was floating for a bit. Minutes seemed to have passed by with me staying completely still. I don't know what was going on. I didn't know what it meant but somewhere along the line , a rhythm took over…

And I began playing. 

**

__

" How do you know if you're really feeling the way you think you are ?" 

" Its not something that can be explained so easily. I just … know." 

**

The notes flow above me , rising as I did , the flux of its influence carrying me forward. 

**

" Tell me then , am I not beautiful to you ?" 

" How should I answer this question ?" 

**

I breathe it in , the smooth tranquility washing me over.

**

" Truthfully one might hope." 

" You would laugh if I did." 

" Really…?" 

**

All at once I feel the tide pulling me in and I brave the cold of its heart.

**

" Yes… Really. But I am a bit curious about something else."

" And what is that ?" 

**

Emotion is suddenly so foreign , so distant and what would embalm in its void , immerses itself in the clearness of nothing. 

__

**

" What about you my lady ? How do you …feel ?"

" The very same way you do." 

**

" Fuck…" 

Maybe I should reconsider Faith as being an angel. My fingers stop working their magic immediately and the music ends. I open my eyes and there she was looking at me , studying me. She almost looked …worried. Concerned even. 

" That's a very sad song. It was kinda…beautiful." 

It was all spoken carefully but I detected the uncertainty expressed in her voice …perhaps some amount of distress as well. Faith let the sheets wrapped around her loosen a bit and sat right beside me , a peculiar look in her eye. 

"…in a depressing sort of way." She finished.

" How long have you been listening ?" I ask , still holding the guitar in my arms.

" Long enough." 

I pursed my lips and wondered what I should say next. Thought about it for a moment. Then I asked another question. 

" How long have I been playing ?"

" Five , maybe ten minutes. I'm not sure. Don't really have a watch on me. I didn't know you could play guitar. " 

" Neither did I. Used to have a guitar not too different from this one. I lived on whatever extra snacks Will would bring me for two months , saving every little dollar I could just to have enough money to buy her." 

" Her…?" Faith raised an eyebrow. 

" Mary Jane. That's what I named her. She was sweet and loyal , always waiting for me when I came home from hell. Sadly I wasn't quite the right man. She deserved better. All I ever brought her was pain. " 

Faith laughed. " Your guitar love-making skills sucked ?" 

" Big time. Even Will couldn't help but scream when she heard me play my baby and _she_ was trying to be nice." 

I smiled as she laughed again but I quickly tensed up a moment after. 

" Did you hear that ?" 

Voices…angry voices from outside. 

Faith doesn't seem to hear them. 

What the hell's going on …???

" I think that's Marie. She's been sick all night." 

" No , not Marie…who's Marie ?" 

" Are you trippin on something …? Maybe that bar-fight damaged your brain more than I thought it did." 

BANG !!! BANG !!! BANG !!! BANG !!! 

Gunshots rang through the air in repeated succession. 

All in all …Not really good. 

Faith chuckled though , a wicked smile lighting up upon her face. It was at that point when a petite , medium dark-skinned girl burst into the room. The girl who I assumed was Marie was pretty. Her eyes were big balls of chocolate brown , curly dark hair just reaching her shoulders , her thin dry lips greeting me with a nervous smile as she entered. She looked tired and out of breath , mumbling something I couldn't understand too well. Sounded like spanish but like I said , I couldn't really understand a word of what she was saying and so all I could do was look at her blankly as she seemingly waited for me to say something in return.

" Calm down Marie. What's going on ?" Faith quickly interjected for me. 

" Cars are coming. Men with guns. You have maybe two , three minutes before they reach here. My brother warned me as quickly as he could. I'm giving you same warning. You're not safe here."

The voices rang louder and louder in my head and my gaze fixed to the open palm of my hand. A terrible scar that I really don't remember having. 

** 

__

" RUN !!!"

" NO !!! I won't leave you behind !!!!" 

__

" Listen to me for once !!! RUN !!!" 

__

" I love you…"

" _Go…"_

** 

BANG !!!

BANG !!!

BANG !!!

I hear the gunshots going off in my head , over and over . I could smell the blood. 

Oh God… 

" Boy toy , you listening ?" I heard Faith say as she scrambled to get dressed into her definition of being more decent. Which isn't too far off from being indecent actually , the sight of it snapping me out of my delusions.

" Wha…?" 

" Senor…you have to leave now. Miguel is not very happy. " 

" Jackass…?" Faith blurted out. " I thought he was dead." She turned her head to me with a grin. " You sure bashed his head in hard enough. Maybe he's a vampire. " beat " Can I get to stake him if he is ? I haven't had much opportunity to get into the vamp slaying groove since I got out of jail. " 

" Sorry to spoil your fun but its daylight. I don't think he's a vamp." 

I grabbed my shirt and picked up the semi-auto Faith had thrown earlier to the floor , quickly running my thoughts into motion.

" Mind if I borrow this ?" 

Faith smiled and tossed me another similar looking piece my way. 

" You can have them back now. No need to ask for my permission. They're yours in the first place and I've never really liked guns anyway. I prefer bare-handed violence." The dark slayer cracked her knuckles.

More shots rang out and a faint shout of something that sounded like something simpson was heard. Then something crashed. 

" They're downstairs now." Faith observed from near the window. "So what's the plan ?"

Plan …? What Plan ???!!! 

Oh , right…. 

Think dammit !!! Think !!!

Think !!!

Think !!!

THINK !!!

I held both guns in a loose grip, pointing them downcast as I sniffed the air around me. 

" Faith , take Marie. Keep her out of harm's way. I'm gonna provide some target practice for the new folks who arrived. Give 'em a bullseye to aim for. " 

" Sure but I don't want to miss out on all the action." 

" You'll have your fun. I promise." I assured her as I checked the extra ammo stashed within my worn dark brown leather coat. At least I thought it was mine . I mean who else could've the jacket belonged to ? Besides it was pretty nice to wear , I mean… " When you're clear , back me up. Hit 'em from behind. I'll head up front. Maim them if you like but NO killing." 

" Yeah , yeah , yeah…" Faith brushed off.

" Senor…" Marie pleaded. " You know I can't leave my home. This is all I have left from my father. " 

Faith grinned. "You won't have to sister , we'll just have to make those sons of bitches think twice about coming to give you trouble." 

Another crash greeted our ears. 

" HOMER SIMPSON !!! COME OUT MONGREL !!! I KNOW YOU'RE HERE !!!" 

" D'oh !!!" My raven-haired partner sniggered " I think he's calling you out Xand."

I give her a look but then failed to keep my own amusement hidden.

" Well then…lets' play." 

I jumped up and kicked open the door that led to our room. As I took my first step outside , memory gaps begin filling in as did my familiarity with the house I was a guest in. It was no house of course. The building was a pretty good-sized two storey motel. Crummy but big. I figured that gave us a decent chance for survival. I don't like being trapped. I heard people screaming . The bad guys were probably pulling out all the people in the joint from their quarters , looking for dear ol' _Homer_. 

He's coming all right , don't get your knickers in a twist bozos.

I approached the staircase in front quickly , seeing out two armed goons climbing up before they saw me. I stretched out my arms to wring out any cramps and prepared my dramatic entrance. Instincts , movements and reactions I never knew I ever had , jumped straight back into the driver's seat and I smiled almost in glee , excitement , anxiety and adrenaline fueling my resolve to kick some ass. 

.Just go with the flow.

" Yippee ki-yay…" 

-------------------------------- 

end part one. 

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End notes: I've actually written the next two parts out but they're not quite ready yet. Rest assured I'll get to finishing them as soon as I can k ? I know I'm late and for that I'm still so ,so, so , so sorry k ? A thousand apologies again. Real Life is shit. Anyway I like to thank everyone who's been with me so far. Thank you for reading , Thank you for your reviews. Thank you for your time. I hope its been time well spent. 

BTW anyone have guesses to what crossover this is yet …? Sadly this one isn't my Btvs/lotr X-over. I'm posting that one next week. That one will be entitled , Son of Fate: Return of the Ring. My thanks goes to Kels for his encouragement on that. Thanks man. 

FEEDBACK !!!!!! Please ….. ? I beg of you…. 

Till next time I remain ………..


	3. part two

****

Disclaimer : I own nothing and to quote a friend of mine , I refuse to believe that this is even necessary !!! but for traditions sake , all characters belong to their respective owners and the only right I have is the credit to this here as I tell you this story. Oh , and yeah the story's mine as well : )

****

Rating : Its mostly PG but I'm putting an R on it just in case. 

****

Summary : Xander has an epic adventure. I'm trying to be all cool and vague here. Is it working ??? Whaddya mean no ? 

****

Author's notes : I can't believe how bad of a week this has been. Man my whole month pretty much sucked but I'm not going to let that further screw with this work. I won't delay any further so here it is the new part to OUT. My most humble and sincere apologies to everyone who waited for this. REAL LIFE SUCKS !!!!! Again - This aint nothing serious but it aint gonna be lame either. I had a little idea that just popped into my head. The lil' idea kept bouncing up and down telling me this is gonna be fun and hell yeah I agree with that wholeheartedly : ) 

****

Feedback : yes please …?

****

Dedication : I never thought I'd be doing this but I'm gonna dedicate this to Buffyverse's biggest spud – Riley Finn . Without him I would've still been puking at the disgusting shagfest that is Spuffy. No offense B/S-ers , I love Spike but sometimes too much is just too much. *shudder* Cheers to ya Agent potato nose !!! Ya aint so bad after all. Finally I'm able to write Buffy fanfic again. Thank you Riley. Added thanks goes to all who reviewed. Thank you all again for your comments. 

In no particular order my appreciation goes to Lori Bush ( Hey there Lori !!!) , Lesley Ann Colgan ( Love ya Lesley ), Mad Minute , Aenima , Bolo , Furious George , Malaskor , Ghostrider , Amelia , Obsidian , Andy , Varthan , Jane McCartney , Elf , WBH21C (Bill) , T D Master ,( again , nah… there's nothing wrong with my account man .y'see ?) Kellan L (Hiya again !!!) Echoes of the mind , Drake Roberts , Nameless Dreamer , Ozmandayus (Hey Shawn , how you've been man ?) Maggie , James W. , NathanPostmark , Alexander the God and Dabear ( have I mentioned how much I love reading your stuff ? Makes me tingle to hear that you like mine.) Thank you all so much. Thanks so very much.

Last but not least to all Xander fans out there. This story is mainly for you. Please Enjoy…

~**~

Once upon a time … by Zauriel Angelus

~**~

Part two:- 

-----------------------

I'm not sure of what exactly I was trying to accomplish here but something in my head seemed to know. For a brief second I wondered if this was the physical manifestation of my Halloween soldier persona coming out in control. 

" Yippee ki-yay…" 

Then again… I felt more like a hotshot gun slinging cowboy then I did a soldier. Go figure. 

I threw the first few shots in with incredible ease , disarming the weapons off the goons in front before I kicked the snot out of their faces. These were the first few bad guys to take the stairs so it was good to know that the second floor was more or less clear. From the corner of my eye , half a dozen or more filthy creeps were entering the motel as four more within firing range stood ready to blow my head off. There were still bystanders though and I wouldn't be caught firing at innocents 

" MOVE !!!" I shouted. 

The panicked residents who were hassled out of their rooms earlier mostly stood about screaming with their hands held up. They didn't seem to get the message so I tried shouting again. 

" RUN !!!" 

Obviously that didn't work until more gunshots were fired. 

Everything stopped for a moment , till…

" OUT !!! OUT !!! OUT !!!" 

Someone was shouting but I knew it wasn't me. It was one of the guys with the machine guns and each 'OUT' was punctuated with a gunshot into the air or in this case, into the roof of our Marie's beloved establishment. 

" OUT !!!" *BANG* !!!

" OUT !!!" *BANG* !!! 

" OUT !!!" *BANG* !!!

See what I mean ? 

And then you see those pack of critters scuttle outside frantically . The hooligans who started making the scene in the first place make way for them to pass oddly enough . They weren't even shooting at me either and I was standing on the stairs just right there in front of them .And how come I was just standing there doing nothing anyway ??? _Weird_ …Of course I knew that I should be thinking that I'm glad or something -that those people were out of harm's way …but it seems all I could manage for now was a disgruntled sigh and a grumble. 

" No one ever listens to me."

A moment of silence not unlike those in the movies where the bad guy and good guy stare at each other for their inevitable showdown and then the bush ball thing rolls into across the frame of the shot , um… passes. Heck I think I might've heard the ol' whistling tune that westerns always have playing before a gunfight. 

I kinda felt like John Wayne. 

Heh.

Then I start to remember that this isn't a movie and people were going to shoot me for real and fill my ass with burning lead. Fortunately I realized that before they did. 

With that I ran across the floor as fast as my feet could carry me , raising my left hand to point one gun to the right and the other to my right , letting it rip before they knew I was moving. The shots hit where they were supposed to , stunning them before they could shoot as I dived for cover in the front bar. 

" Watch your hands and feet people." I quipped before safely sliding behind the counter as shotguns went off. A moment later I was up and running again , mechanically firing in at the assholes between steps. 

I slid behind walls or whatever that brought cover , methodically moving closer and closer to those who hunted me. Every shot I fired wasn't wasted , wounding them one by one , incapacitating them efficiently without killing them. I caught a glimpse at the jackass that wanted my head and sure enough he was dressed funny , bald , fat and ugly. Typical… I'm pretty sure he's stupid too.

" Ooof !!!" 

Something hit me hard in the jaw. 

It hurt a lot.

" There you are Simpson." 

A muscle bound behemoth , yanked me by the collar , lifting me up from the ground with ease. His eyes narrowed in maniacal manner , staring at me like I'm dinner. This close to his face , I couldn't help but notice the massive amount of bandage around his head , his out of shape nose- probably broken , sporting numerous bruises and a really big black eye on his left. When he snarled , I could see two of his teeth missing , the drool seeping out from those holes in his mouth. 

I did a double check.

Hey… wasn't Miguel the guy I supposedly beat the crap out …? 

So who's the fat , ugly , bald guy …? 

Gulp.

I did another double check. 

" _Miguel _...?" I mumbled out. 

" Now you will _PAY_ for the insult you caused to my reputation Homer Simpson !!!" 

You know when someone as huge as Miguel here seriously threatens to send your nose into your brain with the might of his fist , the general reaction would be to scream like a girl or a standard pee your pants thing. 

Me …? What did I do ?

" Heeheeha hehe…HaHAHAHAHAH !!!!" 

….I laughed. 

" HAHAHAHaHa…hehe…heeheehee…" 

I tried not to , really I did but I couldn't help it. I mean everything so far sounds like one sick joke. What kind of loon would write this stuff anyway ? 

It was then that a tremor began rumbling the floor . Miguel insanely panicked and began cursing Spanish expletives out loud ,a mile a minute. Welcoming the distraction I yanked at his arm , pulling him down with me and with my feet pushed his weight over as we both tumbled to the floor. 

As soon as I was free , I made a grab for my guns that had fallen to the floor earlier , whilst kicking at Miguel's face , trying to get as far away from him as I can. The floor was still shaking though and that made it more difficult to get to my feet.

BANG !!! 

Someone screamed and I thought I could hear a distinct mutter of " uh oh ," from somewhere nearby. I turned my head to the right and saw Miguel writhing on the ground , shouting something to the effect of "Aye carumba" or something , clutching both his hands onto his um … manhood. 

I winced at his pain , although inwardly I felt like laughing my head off . Then I could see two of the morons coming towards my direction . 

Ah , I get it now. 

They were trying to shoot me and they missed …or hit the bullseye. Depends on how you look at it I guess. 

I reached my weapons and tucked into a roll as the shaking eased off. I held the guns straight out as the goons quickened their pace , I took my chance at taking them out first , shooting off as my body rolled . 

More shots rang out , it was chaos basically as you would already know. I couldn't hear my own thoughts but my body strangely reacted to the situation like its done this before. Ducking this way , leaning that way , shooting like that , moving like this …etc ,etc. 

I took my cue swiftly when it came as the shadow of Faith entered the fray. Emerging from the spot that was previously my cover I leapt out into the open , guns blazing and legs kicking. Everything went John Woo slow-mo style with each breath I took. I was a _bad ass…. The BAD ASS…_ It was so cool and frightening at the same time. I mean inside my head I was going like whoa…_coooooooolllll …_y'know ???_._

I felt free and I felt caged as well . 

Faith swooped in and ambushed whoever she could , using her slayer enhanced strength to full effect. She threw one guy out the window. Nailed another in the balls and sent two more flying into worlds of hurt. I kicked the shit out of this hairy guy and smashed my fist pretty hard into the face of a really smelly one. 

We kicked ass !!!

Guess who won …?

The bad guys were all lying on the floor - still alive of course , the motel was a real mess but it wasn't that bad… well not too bad. The smell of gun-smoke in the air , dried blood and a bit of urine hanging. And there I was standing tall alongside the raven-haired slayer , our heads held up high in victory and our stomachs rumbling about lunch . 

" Working out like that always leads to hunger." Faith shrugged as I turned to look at her. 

" Is it over …?" Marie popped out from wherever she was hiding , 

" Yup …sorry bout the mess though." I glanced down at Miguel who was still crying out in pain as he lay unmoving on the dirty floor. " He needs a doctor."

" That's gotta hurt." Faith commented. Then she smiled at me " Y'know I take back what I said about you standing up for me and being a manly moron yesterday. If this is what happens every time you butt your nose in to protect my pride , you really should do this more often." 

Obviously I smile back but my eyes trail outside and I walk out of the building to see what the scenery held when I stepped out that door. 

I took it all in with a few blinks and then turned and headed up to my room , walking past Faith and Marie without so much of a word. When I entered my quarters I took my jacket off , laid the guns down on the dresser and sat on the bed with a dumb look on my face. 

" Oh fucking hell…"

Faith walked in on that moment , closing the door as she did. The girl slammed her fist on the rusty fan and it came to life immediately. She then slid into my arms , her eyes carrying that look that I know so well. 

" Not feeling good baby…?" She pouted a bit playfully. 

With a smirk she whispered into my ear with a voice bathed in honey. 

__

" _Let me make it all better…" _

Her fingers trailed down from my shirt slowly and then…

Ziiiiipp……

Somehow everything seemed well with the world. 

" Huh …somewhere in Mexico." 

I guess I can live with that for the moment

--------------------------------- 

end part two. 

****

End notes: My apologies again to those who were patiently waiting. It couldn't be helped. I've been thru hell this month and my pathetic excuse for a love life got shot to smithereens as well. I can't seem to catch a break…*sigh* Mostly action and senseless other things. I don't think too much of it but it worked okay I guess. Anyway there wasn't much to this chapter but more will come on later. We'll get to see much more fun stuff soon. I'll reveal a bit of how everything comes to all this then so stay tuned for that. 

Also congrats to those who guessed right for this crossover. This is sorta an El Mariachi/Desperado crossover. My little sis gave me the whole idea and this is what we have. I'll post the next chap to this as soon as I can but after that I warn ya not to expect too much from me cos I've got this real huge project I need to work on. I'll be real busy I expect but hopefully I'll get everything settled soon. 

FEEDBACK !!!!!! Please ….. ? My life depends on it… well sorta. 

Till next time I remain………..


	4. part three

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Disclaimer : I own nothing and to quote a friend of mine , I refuse to believe that this is even necessary !!! but for traditions sake , all characters belong to their respective owners and the only right I have is the credit to this here as I tell you this story. Oh , and yeah the story's mine as well : )

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Rating : Its mostly PG but I'm putting an R on it just in case. 

****

Summary : Xander has an epic adventure. I'm trying to be all cool and vague here. Is it working ??? Whaddya mean no ? 

****

Author's notes : My most humble and sincere apologies once again to everyone who waited for this. REAL LIFE SUCKS !!!!! This is the new chapter to OUT and I really hope you like it. And sorry for being as late as I am. REAL LIFE SUCKS !!! *sigh*Again - This aint nothing too serious but it aint gonna be lame either. I had a little idea that just popped into my head. The lil' idea kept bouncing up and down telling me this is gonna be fun and hell yeah I agree with that wholeheartedly : ) 

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Feedback : yes please …?

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Dedication : I never thought I'd be doing this but I'm gonna dedicate this to Buffyverse's biggest spud – Riley Finn . Without him I would've still been puking at the disgusting shagfest that is Spuffy. No offense B/S-ers , I love Spike but sometimes too much is just too much. *shudder* Cheers to ya Agent potato nose !!! Ya aint so bad after all. Finally I'm able to write Buffy fanfic again. Thank you Riley. Added thanks goes to all who reviewed. Thank you all again for your comments. 

In no particular order my appreciation goes to Lori Bush ( Hey there Lori !!!) , Lesley Ann Colgan ( Love ya Lesley. _Really_ I do. Honest !!! ), Mad Minute , Aenima , Bolo , Furious George , Malaskor , Ghostrider , Amelia , Obsidian , Andy , Varthan , Jane McCartney , Elf , WBH21C (Bill) , T D Master ,( again , nah… there's nothing wrong with my account man .y'see ?) Kellan L (Hiya again !!!) Echoes of the mind , Drake Roberts , Nameless Dreamer , Ozmandayus (Hey Shawn , how you've been man ?) Maggie , James W. , NathanPostmark , Alexander the God , Dabear ( YO !!!) , Canis Black ( You aint the only one going -what the hell ???!!! ;- ) Maijin Gojira , White Werewolf (Whassup BX brother!!!) , Wicked Raygun ( Can I still take you up on that offer you made cos y'know…my Spanish sucks) Thank you all so much. Thanks so very much. Every one of ya : ) If I missed anyone gimme a yell. You'll be here in no time k ?

Last but not least to all Xander fans out there. This story is mainly for you. Please Enjoy…

~**~

Once upon a time … by Zauriel Angelus

~**~

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Part three :- 

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I heard it again… 

The guitar singing that same ol' tune.

Music was playing tonight …but what was the story behind this song …? 

That was what I'd like to find out too. 

Its been dark for a while and I've been awake for as long as I can tell , shifting through my head to find exactly how I got from point A to point B. What was I doing in Mexico ? Why ? What was I doing before this ? 

Man did I have a lot of questions and the more I seemed to think about it , the more the answers seem to elude me. My mind just blanks when I get close. The only info I could scratch up seems to be basic stuff.

Stuff I've already known. Old memories…

My name's Alexander Lavelle Harris. Born and raised in Sunnydale California by two _wonderful _parents. I remember Jesse and Will being my best buds when I was younger. I remember discovering the hellmouth , the world of vampires. I remember being scared. I remember meeting the mighty slayer and her watcher. How could forget G-man ? I also remember …losing Jesse. How I never cried for him. I remember being part of the famous Scooby Gang. I remember being possessed by a hyena, falling in love with Ampata , mummy girl , almost mating with a Praying mantis , becoming a soldier on Halloween , dating Cordelia , hating Deadboy , joking around with monosyllabic Wolfboy , meeting Kendra , being the Zeppo , losing my cherry to Faith …ooh that was a night. I remembered us fighting the Master , Spike and Drusilla , Angelus , the lie that sent him to hell and back , Mr Trick , The Mayor and his ascension. Then I remember not getting into college , Riley , Tara , Anya … the Initiative , stuck with some of the worst jobs on the planet , Spike chipped and living with me in the basement*brrr* …oh and Adam . I remember Dawn being the key. I remember Doc , Ben and Glory … being split into two , fighting a Troll , I remembered Spike actually being on our team as we kicked Glory's ass and that's …about it. 

The memories after that were vague , scattered images that don't quite make sense.

That was all I could recall back , the more recent turn of events came up zilch and so I kept going back and forth with what I could remember rather than what I couldn't cos I had the distinct feeling that I missed something there in the past. Something didn't feel right at all. And I was so sure that that was the connection to the missing dots but what was it …? 

I considered asking Faith but she was asleep. I didn't want to disturb her. I also didn't want to arouse suspicion . She seemed to act like us being together had been going on for a while now , that this was … _normal_. And for me _everything_ was weird and so I try to act as normal as I could about it , or as normal as one could be about the situation at hand. I didn't want her to think that I was being weird y'know …? 

And then there's also the thing where I didn't want to upset her. Not because I feared her wrath or whatsoever. I just didn't want to worry her and that in itself was a puzzle to me. 

Why was Faith , the once psycho slayer , with me ? And why did she seem to care ? She definitely wasn't the same Faith that I once knew. The girl was different and I… I seem to be more fond of her than I remember being.

Was this a reinforcement of those memories I can't recall …? Were we … together , _together ?_

I don't know really but I found myself looking at Faith the way I never had before and as she slept beside me in bed , I watched her breathe with such fascination and wonder that I'm not quite familiar with. I didn't know what I was feeling … but I definitely was feeling _something_.

Unconsciously my hand reached on its own , a soft caress upon her cheek , fingers slowly wandering towards the pink of her lips as I questioned the still air around me with the whisper of one word. 

" How…?" 

The raven-haired slayer settled and leaned into my touch , an almost silent sigh of content leaving her lips as she did so.

" _Xand_…"

Did you hear that …? I know I did. 

__

Oh my God…

Faith was saying my name in her sleep… in a _moan_. 

Oh boy… _Ooooh boy…_

Now level with me guys and girls , is that a good thing or a bad thing …?

Cos I'm really not too sure right now. 

And I sure as hell don't trust my own judgement with sixteen year old Xander Harris jumping and screaming with maniacal glee inside my head. 

I blinked and then I blinked again. Then I channeled all my God given comedic talent to this one moment and pulled off my best ever impression of Oz the wolf boy. 

" Huh…" 

As carefully as I could , I extracted myself from Faith and the bed , tiptoeing as I put my pants and boots on. I made my way to the window as a chilly breeze blew in. The black of night was staring me in the face and after a moment there it was , a feeling of unmistakable dread filled me. 

Something in me went on auto-pilot and I followed its instincts as I descended down from the room and into the unknown that was the darkened motel. I reasoned to turn on some lights but unfortunately almost every one of them was fucked up since the gunfight we had earlier. Everything was quiet which wasn't really so surprising since most of the tenants had vacated their rooms after the Tarantino film that ran through this joint just hours before courtesy of _moi_. Wait …maybe it was more of a Rob Rodriguez film. It _is_ Mexico after all. 

From the second floor I treaded slowly , keeping alert of my surroundings. It took several minutes before it occurred to me of what I was actually doing. 

I was out hunting … unarmed …and shirtless too.

Hmnn…

Its no wonder why I'm cold. 

I walk to the first floor , strangely drawn to the middle of the messy hall. In the center I stopped as a tremor began and some keys in my scrambled mind begin to unlock as did images of a forgotten life. 

A roar … savage and wild , sprung forth from this dream . 

A voice screaming for help… 

A woman in fear … in pain… 

I see the swift movement of shadows , a dance of blood in its midst. The violent shrieking is horrible to the ear but its vision was something I couldn't turn myself away from even as I tried. Someone is shouting , struggling alone against those monsters. Gunshots keep going off and in the frenzy of it all , death claims its victims and the phantoms shriek again in victory.

I finally see the woman in the puddle of her own blood and her name is upon my lips , the wretched sorrow and haunted , piercing pain almost tangible in its grasp of my soul. 

" _Carolina…"_

Darkness comes again and I merge with it , feeling a strange shift in the air around me. I suddenly realize I've been sweating like a pig and when _something evil this way_ comes , my mind tells me its gonna look at this unarmed , smelly and sweat-filled pig and immediately see dinner.

A moment of hesitation passes and I pounced into battle , leaping back , my hands rocketing forward as the fight began . Two quick arms rush for my neck but somehow I had telegraphed the assault and my hands that were in position grabbed those of my attacker before he or it , could grab me. I couldn't see its face clearly as darkness hid its features but I measured that it was most definitely not human. 

Whatever it was , it was fast . Almost got blind-sided right then and there if I wasn't ready. With the advantage in my corner , I yanked , diving backwards as I did , turning mid-air as I delivered a smashing right boot into its abdomen. 

The thing shrieked as it crashed to the ground and I sent another hard kick at it , the impact of which propelled its body into the corner of a wall. 

I heard a soft growl this time and disturbingly …I smiled. 

It was hurt. 

And I could smell its blood…

I waited patiently for it to move again , knowing it was going to try an attack one more time. With my legs spaced apart and rooted to the floor , I held my stance like a predator awaiting its kill. My hands spread wide , inviting it to take a bite while it still has a chance to. 

In a manner of seconds it took the bait and went for me and of course I was more than ready. I timed it perfectly and swung a sweet little fist into its face that scored a satisfying crack . I revved up my left arm quickly and followed up with a rising backhand. With the breath it had knocked out of it ( if it had any of course ) the final blow came as I smashed a crushing right to the skull. My assailant fell unceremoniously to my feet in a tangle of bruised flesh and limbs. 

" What the…?" 

For a moment the darkness in the room cleared and to that end , the face of a young girl looked up to me in as much confusion as I was in. 

" Marie …?" 

Those innocent eyes of brown turn dark blood red and her mouth opens as sharp fangs grow almost instantaneously. Her skin pales and the growl of her hunger finds its voice , her body shriveling into a more sinister form. 

Something I know I've seen before. 

" XANDER BEHIND YOU !!!" 

At that point when I heard Faith's voice warning me , Marie attacks and I react to the best of it , raising my arms in front of me as I turned into a spin and swung a deflecting back fist. It struck true to its point and I lunged at her neck , grabbing as hard as I prepared to throw her to the side and out of my way. My mind was already busy preparing for the next attack from behind and my body was bracing into it as quickly as it could. 

The taste of dust swirled around and I heard the moment take me in swiftly , the sound of dashing footsteps down the staircase , the chilling crying shriek of what was once Marie resonating in my ear , the loud crash as her body hit the floor and the wood splinters , the impact sending Marie through it ,cracking as she went below. I heard the beating of my heart slow to a crawl and the wind from my breath caught in the flux as the grind of my boots shifted , the wooden floors creaking as I swerved to face my back. I turned , my teeth clenched , my fists ready and my strength willing . 

That's when everything stopped and I stared. 

Inches away from me , she stood . Beautiful eyes of amber staring into mine. She smiled sadly , her dark hair flowing in ghostly eerie. And as time froze , something passed between us , a hint of knowing , of recognition. Before I realized what was happening she said something that I almost didn't hear. 

" Mariachi …?" 

Then I was flying through the air.

I never knew what hit me. 

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end part three. 

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End notes: So there it is part three is endeth. I think it was okay .What about you ? I'm sure you have a lot of questions and so does Xander . A few of the answers are coming up in the next chapter. I'm three-quarters done on that. Faith is also gonna have more of a role soon , I promise. I also know I'm really late (sorrysorrysorrysorry) and I'm gonna try to make it up those of you out there. So here's the deal really. If I get at least five reviews on this chap I'll finish the next chap ASAP and release it within the next two days. So it's really up to you. Heeheeheee !!!! I'M EVIL !!!! 

Anyway feedback is a good thing and I'd love to see some of that please…. ??? 

HELLO ??? ANYBODY …there ??? Um… gimme feedback …??? Pretty please with a leather clad Faith on top… ?

Till next time I remain………. 


	5. part four

**Disclaimer :** I own nothing and to quote a friend of mine , I refuse to believe that this is even necessary !!! but for traditions sake , all characters belong to their respective owners and the only right I have is the credit to this here as I tell you this story. Oh , and yeah the story's mine as well : )  
  
**Rating :** Its mostly PG but I'm putting an R on it just in case.  
  
**Summary :** Xander has an epic adventure. F/X goodness all around. Surreal Action ,Weird Humour and Crazy romance. My forte , or so I've been told. :) Forget logic , this will be downright silly at times. Expect only fun crazy stuff.  
  
**Author's notes :** So so sorry about the super long wait. (oops) I don't know if anyone remembers at all but anyway I was too busy .Never really had time. sigh Again - This aint nothing too serious but it aint gonna be lame either. I had a little idea that just popped into my head. The lil' idea kept bouncing up and down telling me this is gonna be fun and hell yeah I agree with that wholeheartedly : )  
  
**Feedback :** yes please …?  
  
**Dedication :** To everyone who has read this or any of my other works , to those who have supported me thru the last turbulent few years I've had and not least of all, to all Xander fans out there. This story is mainly for you. Thank you. Please Enjoy…  
  
_Once upon a time_ … by Zauriel Angelus  
  
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**Part four :-**  
  
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It felt like a damn Mack-truck had hit me.  
  
Right in my damn face too .  
  
Ow ... that really _really_ hurt.  
  
I landed on the floor the hard way , so hard in fact that the impact splintered the wooden floor under me. A lot of splinterin' going on I tell ya ! Been a while since I've took such a hit. Of course where previously this kinda thing would've knocked my socks off and render me totally unconcious , I actually got up to my feet although it was a bit slower than I would've liked it to be.  
  
Took me almost ten seconds to fully stand up. My head was a lil woozy and my balance was off quite a 't see too well either since my vision temporarily went to shot. It's basically one of those moments where I'm a sitting duck or um... well , a barely standing duck. And for those of you just tuning it there's one badass mother of an evil chick who's gonna kill me !!! Gone was the beautiful face I saw before.  
  
I wasn't sure if it was a demon but let's see...  
  
Razor sharp teeth.  
  
Pale hideously deformed face.  
  
Long sharp claw-like hands.  
  
And a solid left hook ...  
  
I was practically helpless.  
  
It's moments like this when I thank God ...

Thank God for Faith.A girl like that was exactly what I needed right now. Every pound on her being of pure slayer , skilled , deadly and powerful as heck , I mean like Spiderman' strong. Not to mention she's hot as hell ...mmmm  
  
Faith strode in like the Goddess that she was, in full slayer-mode, her tight leather clad (super-hot !!!) ass swooping in to save my bacon, launching herself at fangy like a damn rocket.  
  
There was a flurry of fists , they were both moving so fast it was hard to follow with what was happening. The slayer was focused on taking her opponent down quick and hard. Unfortunately Lady red was making her really work for it. There wasn't a drop of sweat on Faith even though the fight was evenly matched.  
  
Soon enough Faith saw an opening and took it, parrying a hard blow into one of her own. Her boot finally getting the solid kick to the face she was looking for. Faith followed up her snap kick with a roundhouse, before hooking right into a rather spectacular uppercut that would've made those overly muscled anime characters of Street Fighter proud.  
  
It was evil bitch's turn to fly and fly she did.  
  
Weird thing was there was no crash at the end of that flight. Our monster simply vanished into thin air right in front of our faces. The shadows seemed to just swallow her right up.  
  
Faith was startled but only for moment. She kept her fighting stance , very much still standing on high alert.  
  
Finally recovering from the punishment I just took , I made it a point to catch my breath and reacquaint myself with my surroundings. I couldn't see Marie anywhere now, the spot where I flung her previously possessed self at, now suspiciously empty. Then I finally utter my long awaited first line of actual dialogue in this chapter." Ow...."What a moment ! Doncha think so too ?" You ok , X ?"  
  
" Five by five , Faith."Since when do I say that ?!! What is going on with me ? Somebody please tell me soon." This is gonna sound so cliche but I got a _baaad _feeling about this."  
  
" Wicked. I told you Mexico was gonna be a fun ride." The slayer smiled.  
  
" Why the hell I went along with you , I'll likely never ever know." I mumbled out.  
  
Faith's smile quickly turned to a frown soon after that." X , we got serious company."  
  
" You see Marie anywhere ?"  
  
" No Marie from my view. I see something else though. You seein' X ?"I rubbed my eyes to check if I was imagining it but true enough it seemed every shadow around us was coming alive. From almost every corner of darkness they sprung out slowly into sight." She-bitch got herself a few friends."  
  
" Make that a lot of friends. Tell me again Faith. How fun is this gonna be ?"We were surrounded and possibly fucked , I mean earlier I was already f...-but that was a good thing instead of this bad thing which is bad and not good and what I'm saying right now ...um y'know I mean that in a bad way right ? All I'm saying ...  
  
_Ahem_  
  
It was bad shit.  
  
Are we clear ?" I think we're about to find out."I really wish I was doing the good thing that I did with Faith earlier right now instead.  
  
Know what I'm saying ...?_MmmmmFaith ....__  
_  
  
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end part three.  
  
End notes: That writer's block is over and done with. I hoped you'd enjoyed this as I did writing it. The next chapter will come soon. Again so sorry bout the wait. Anyhoo thank you so much for reading :)FEEDBACK PLEASE !!!!!!!!!Till next time ... 


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